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the good-will of the cook, am I? Oh! I
suppose you never do anything of this sort,
yourselves? No politician among you was ever
particularly assiduous in cultivating the
good-will of a minister, eh? No clergyman
in cultivating the good-will of a bishop,
humph? No fortune-seeker in cultivating
the good-will of a patron, hah? You have
no toad-eating, no time-serving, no place-hunting,
no lacqueyship of gold and silver sticks, or
anything of that sort, I suppose? You haven't
too many cooks, in short, whom you are all
assiduously cultivating, till you spoil the
general broth? Not you. You leave that to
the Ravens.

Your friend BUFFON, and some more of
you, are mighty ready, it seems, to give us
characters. Would you like to hear about
your own temper and forbearance? Ask the
Dog. About your never overloading or
ill-using a willing creature? Ask my brother-in-law's
friend, the Camel, up in the Zoological.
About your gratitude to, and your provision
for, old servants? I wish I could refer you to
the last Horse I dined off (he was very tough),
up at a knacker's yard in Battle Bridge.
About your mildness, and your abstinence
from blows and cudgels? Wait till the
Donkey's book comes out!

You are very fond of laughing at the parrot,
I observe. Now, I don't care for the parrot.
I don't admire the parrot's voiceit wants
hoarseness. And I despise the parrot's livery
considering black the only true wear. I
would as soon stick my bill into the parrot's
breast as look at him. Sooner. But if you
come to that, and you laugh at the parrot
because the parrot says the same thing over
and over again, don't you think you could get
up a laugh at yourselves ? Did you ever know
a Cabinet Minister say of a flagrant job or
great abuse, perfectly notorious to the whole
country, that he had never heard a word of
it himself, but could assure the honourable
gentleman that every enquiry should be
made? Did you ever hear a Justice remark,
of any extreme example of ignorance, that it
was a most extraordinary case, and he couldn't
have believed in the possibility of such a case
when there had been, all through his life,
ten thousand such within sight of his chimney-pots ?
Did you ever hear, among yourselves,
anything approaching to a parrot repetition
of the words, Constitution, Country, Public
Service, Self-Go vernment, Centralisation,
Un-English, Capital, Balance of Power, Vested
Interests, Corn, Rights of Labor, Wages, or
so forth ? Did you ever?No! Of course
you never!

But to come back to that fellow BUFFON.
He finds us Ravens to be most extraordinary
creatures. We have properties so remarkable,
that you 'd hardly believe it. 'A piece
of money, a teaspoon, or a ring,' he says, 'are
always tempting baits to our avarice. These
we will slily seize upon; and, if not watched,
carry to our favorite hole.' How odd!

Did you ever hear of a place called California?
I have. I understand there are a
number of animals over there, from all parts of
the world, turning up the ground with their
bills, grubbing under the water, sickening,
moulting, living in want and fear, starving,
dying, tumbling over on their backs,
murdering one another, and all for what? Pieces
of money that they want to carry to their
favourite holes. Ravens every one of 'em!
Not a man among 'em, bless you!

Did you ever hear of Railway Scrip? /
have. We made a pretty exhibition of
ourselves about that, we feathered creatures!
Lord, how we went on about that Railway
Scrip! How we fell down, to a bird, from
the Eagle to the Sparrow, before a scarecrow,
and worshipped it for the love of the bits of
rag and paper fluttering from its dirty
pockets! If it hadn't tumbled down in its
rottenness, we should have clapped a title on
it within ten years, I 'll be sworn! — Go along
with you, and your BUFFON, and don't talk
to me!

'The Raven don't confine himself to petty
depredations on the pantry or the larder'
here you are with your BUFFON again'but
he soars at more magnificent plunder, that he
can neither exhibit nor enjoy. This must be
very strange to you men more than it is to
the Cat who lived with that old lady, though!

Now, I am not going to stand this. You
shall not have it all your own way. I am
resolved that I won't have Ravens written
about by men, without having men written
about by Ravensat all events by one Raven,
and that's me. I shall put down my opinions
about you. As leisure and opportunity serve,
I shall collect a natural history of you. You
are a good deal given to talk about your
missions. That's my mission. How do you
like it?

I am open to contributions from any animal
except one of your set; bird, beast, or fish,
may assist me in my mission, if he will. I
have mentioned it to the Cat, intimated it to
the Mouse, and proposed it to the Dog. The
Owl shakes his head when I confide it to him,
and says he doubts. He always did shake his
head, and doubt. Whenever he brings himself
before the public, he never does anything
except shake his head and doubt. I should
have thought he had got himself into a sufficient
mess by doing that, when he roosted for
a long time in the Court of Chancery. But he
can't leave off. He's always at it.

Talking of missions, here's our Proprietor's
Wife with a mission now! She has found out
that she ought to go and vote at elections;
ought to be competent to sit in Parliament;
ought to be able to enter the learned
professionsthe army and navy, too, I believe.
She has made the discovery that she has no
business to be the comfort of our Proprietor's
life, and to have the hold upon him of not
being mixed up in all the janglings and
wranglings of men, but is quite ill-used in being

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