+ ~ -
 
Please report pronunciation problems here. Select and sample other voices. Options Pause Play
 
Report an Error
Go!
 
Go!
 
TOC
 

BETTING-SHOPS.

IN one sporting newspaper for Sunday,
June the fourteenth, there are nine-and-twenty
advertisements from Prophets, who
have wonderful information to givefor
a consideration ranging from one pound
one, to two-and-sixpenceconcerning every
"event" that is to come off upon the
Turf. Each of these Prophets has an
unrivalled arid unchallengeable "Tip," founded
on amazing intelligence communicated to him
by illustrious unknowns (traitors of course,
but that is nobody's business) in all the racing
stables. Each, is perfectly clear that his
enlightened patrons and correspondents must
win; and each, begs to guard a too-confiding
world against relying on the other. They are
all philanthropists. One Sage announces
"that when he casts his practised eye on
the broad surface of struggling society, and
witnesses the slow and enduring perseverance
of some, and the infatuous rush of the many
who are grappling with a cloud, he is led
with more intense desire to hold up the lamp
of light to all." He is also much afflicted,
because "not a day passes, without his
witnessing the public squandering away their
money on worthless rubbish." Another,
heralds his re-appearance among the lesser
stars of the firmament with the announcement,
"Again the Conquering Prophet
comes!" Another moralist intermingles with
his "Pick," and "Tip," the great Christian
precept of the New Testament. Another,
confesses to a small recent mistake which has
made it "a disastrous meeting for us," but
considers that excuses are unnecessary (after
making them), for, "surely, after the
unprecedented success of the proofs he has lately
afforded of his capabilities in fishing out the
most carefully-hidden turf secrets, he may
readily be excused one blunder." All the
Prophets write in a rapid manner, as receiving
their inspiration on horseback, and noting
it down, hot and hot, in the saddle, for the
enlightenment of mankind and the restoration
of the golden age.

This flourishing trade is a melancholy
index to the round numbers of human donkeys
who are everywhere browzing about. And
it is worthy of remark that the great mass
of disciples were, at first, undoubtedly to
be found among those fast young gentlemen,
who are so excruciatingly knowing that
they are not by any means to be taken in by
SHAKESPEARE, or any sentimental gammon
of that sort. To us, the idea of this
would-be keen race being preyed upon by
the whole Betting-Book of Prophets, is one
of the most ludicrous pictures the mind can
imagine; while there is a just and pleasant
retribution in it which would awaken in us
anything but animosity towards the Prophets,
if the mischief ended here.

But, the mischief has the drawback that it
does not end here. When there are so many
Picks and Tips to be had, which will, of a
surety, pick and tip their happy owners into the
lap of Fortune, it becomes the duty of every
butcher's boy and errand lad who is sensible
of what is due to himself, immediately to
secure a Pick and Tip of the cheaper sort,
and to go in and win. Having purchased
the talisman from the Conquering Prophet,
it is necessary that the noble sportsman
should have a handy place provided for
him, where lists of the running horses and of
the latest state of the odds, are kept, and
where he can lay out his money (or somebody
else's) on the happy animals at whom
the Prophetic eye has cast a knowing
wink. Presto! Betting-shops spring up
in every street! There is a demand at
all the brokers' shops for old, fly-blown,
coloured prints of race-horses, and for any
odd folio volumes that have the appearance
of Ledgers. Two such prints in any
shop-window, and one such book on any
shop-counter, will make a complete Betting-office,
bank, and all.

The Betting-shop may be a Tobacconist's,
thus suddenly transformed; or it may be
nothing but a Betting-shop. It may be got
up cheaply, for the purposes of Pick and Tip
investment, by the removal of the legitimate
counter, and the erection of an official
partition and desk in one corner; or, it may be
wealthy in mahogany fittings, French polish,
and office furniture. The presiding officer, in
an advanced stage of shabbiness, may be
accidentally beheld through the little window
whence from the inner mysteries of the
Temple, he surveys the devotees before entering
on businessdrinking gin with an
admiring client; or he may be a serenely